But it takes like 2 hours for my blogs to post? I keep asking these questions..and I keep getting no answers x_x Ill prolly head to bed soon, but ill comment comments and write something interesting tomorrow most likely.

Heres how my day went

..Half as much as aaaanything else. Contrary to Julies stern face..which lets face it, only makes me laugh, Im gonna watch Greek, and eat some food!!

Howd everyones day go?? Im tired of talking about me lol.

ok ok, Im back..Sorry for the huge gap, didnt mean to keep my loyal FOUR! thats right, up to four now, readers waiting in suspense. I had a lot to process this weekend. Btw Joe, were gonna discuss all that on aim or something, and congrats on your halo . ...now get gold!

I decided I need to take whatever part of my money I can from my checks and go get back on adderal..It scares me kinda to get back on it. but, ADD is killing me again with everything going on. I can do my math with my eyes closed, Yet again this morning I cant do my test..its like my brain get dislexia with numbers *sigh* Its been really bad in government too. I keep spacing out for like half the class. At least I dont space out in calc. Its really hard to explain what happens in math..its not like im sitting in class thinking about space shuttles, Im there, but my brain retains the wrong numbers and comes out wrong. and I do 90 percent of my work in my head (altho my teachers hate it, I get lost on paper) and so i get the right answer, and write the wrong one inversed or backwards down..it keeps getting worse the more stressed I get. I always double check my answers, cuz ive done it since i was like old enough to add and substract, but now our problems take like 15 minutes to do, and I just dont have the time to recheck them. Wow, i rambled way more than i wanted on that.

Homeskillet and I did the little motel cover!! turned out amazing I think, as do others. To address Morgans comments ill just do it here. All the poor quality, was youtube, I have no idea why. It wasnt amazing quality to begin with, but youtube killed it, i might reupload it and see why, ill post the original video and the mp3 here later if anyone wants to download it. As far as his vocals getting lost. thats my fault. he kept the same level the whole way, I didnt, my stuff gets way louder at the end when I bring in the distorted guitar. Heres the video

Hopefully we will be doing a lot more of these, and He is officially the singer for the indie project, he also plays some good acoustic guitar, So im excited to find some time in the future to start working on this! So everyone else get to writing!! It weird how little of things u can find inspiration from, I wrote a whole thing about that webcam at lake ana ryan mentioned lol. Im gonna post it, but its not done yet. Speaking of which, I think if we get some of these things done (songs) Ryan and Dana should contribute their video/art to it..Thats just what I think lol.

Im gonna treat this as a diary today. I pay for the hosting...Plus, Only Morgan, Julie, and Ryan read it anyways, and 2/3s of them already know all this.

I decided last week, I wanted to sit down with breanne and kinda, figure out how we would get back together, and how to go about it, and whether we overall decided we made mistakes..We had talked about us not being friends the week b4 that...and ive been feeling horribly replaced by a new guy in the friendship department, and i just ..*sigh* kept waiting for her to pick me for something on a night off rather than him so we could talk about it...that never came, I got blah blah with eric b4 I could hardly get an invite even on the table. Like, doing something with me never crossed her mind.  I wanted to see if we were happier apart..and she apparently was, thats a good thing right? I guess..depending on what side your on.  I wanted to go to an Italian festival thing tonight way up north like so we could talk about it..i figured 6am was an early enough invite but the third text was blah blah then im going over to erics. I decided to end it at that point *sigh*. I had to do it, this has been killing me, Morgan can only do soo much for me. I ended the non existent friendship also, there was no point..she wasnt ever going to want to do something with me first anyways. She didnt even seem to care, just needed to know whether to get her stuff. I guess this seperation was a pretty good thing, makes me happy knowing we did the right thing. Im so full of resentment at the moment tho its hard to think straight.  So now im just...how to go forward? ..but im lost. I think I have a way to be happy, truly happy, but i have no idea where that road leads in the future..I think I'll make it tho, Ive made a lot of changes, lost a lot of friends..but, im stubborn. I still have Morgan and Julie who keep me going somehow as amazing best friends. and altho Ryan and Everett and I arent really those type of friends, its good to have aquaintances who are just, overall kickass and funny. And Burkes in the middle lol.

So while Im hurting, I feel, ..I dunno, justified. I always said if we were better together we won, and if one of us found out we werent, we won. and, we won. My god damn logic always proves right *sigh*. I have to heavily alter some life plans starting today. I have to go talk to rays about a ring. I have to get the jeep back and lose the car, even tho it was her choice for me to have it cuz she wanted the jeep, im no longer comfortable having her pay for it and I paid for the jeep and its in my name. theres just a lot to do...as if i wasnt busy enough. I have to tell my mother, good god, shes gonna die. fuck my family up here, they dont give a shit about anything pertaining to me apparently these days.

heres goes round 3 of major life changes, at least this one only came with rhetorical ass fucking instead of an actual risk for it.

End diary section, this will be a blog from now on.

I sent out my first batch of singer invites a few months ago, I made sure they listened to my music first, and then asked if they were interested in singing. I got 11 or so people who were like "oh fuck yeah! woo! yay! blah blah bla blah." none of course would produce anything, what.so.ever.at.all. of course this is frustrating. But last night, I wanted to see if anyone else had even done a vocal cover of little motel, noone has, let alone a full band cover..but i found a dude that had quite a few other little motel covers. All of which were pretty kickass. I sent him a message, and figured what the hell, we'll see. and he of course acted interested, I couldnt even act excited lol, I just said kewl, talked about the little indie project (as hes heavily into indie). But to my surprise...I get an email like 30 minutes later, with some of the song already sang! crazy, he accomplished more in 90 minutes than everyone else in 2 or 3 months! lol. So I have a new sense of ..motivation! yeah, thats the word.motivation!

I saw an article comparing Michael Jackson to Freddy Mercury. This is why I avoid the internet from time to time. Michael Jackson was an amazing performer and songwriter, but to compare him to Freddy Mercury is purely f u c k i n g insane!! He was like the best vocal performer of ...whats the word im looking for..hmm...like ever!! I just feel like these two cant even be compared at all, ..is it too soon to say they had nothing in common, and even Jackson liked little boys and Mercury liked full grown men? Maybe, but they had nothing in common! Its like comparing Justin Timberlake and Pavarotti or something. Sure, they are both great, but not in the same regards at alllll. Rhapsody is normal the obvious choice to display some true Freddy talent, however, I feel that they all sing together too much, So I chose something in which he was merely accompanied by the other singers, so to display his ability to truly rip on vocals I leave you with this: (If you think Im wrong, please link me to Jackson projecting this kind of range and vocal talent, doesnt even have to be live even, without studio effects, breaks, and do overs)